across the miles

Lord, thank you for the internet. And thank you for esvee. A million million times thank you for friends. Thank you for this family.

I friend and I was talking through YM. I got a hug. And i could feel it physically. As in. Pati ako nagulat. Naiyak ako.

I guess i'm so frayed at the edges now. I just didn't realize how much. Oo okay pa naman ako. Pero barely. Haha. So brittle that it takes so little to shatter me these days.... Stress ba ito? Or kulang lang talga ako sa yakap dito? I guess kulang nga ako sa yakap dito. At maulan kase. At magpapasko na. At stressful lang talaga ang napili kong buhay. Sana pala nag-artista na lng ako?! *laughs*

Erich Segal said in his book Doctors said that doctors distance themselves from their patients and don't care so much not because we lack compassion but for self-preservation. If we cared for all our patients we'd all break from the strain. Or go nuts with load. I guess i know what he means. And i didn't know how close to breaking i was until i got hugged by a friend. Even if that hug was sent (or should i say 'said') through the internet. Ang powerful nga naman ng mga salita noh?

But then if we didn't care, what kind of physicians would we be? I guess it's only prudent to not make the patient's problems our own but it is also not wise to be unfeeling in treating. That would take the heart of this supposedly caring profession.

I guess i just wanted to say that i really appreciate the hugs you send. I feel them. Physically. I do. And i thank you so much for sending them. It keeps me sane.

So thank you.
Sa yakap.
*yakaptight*